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Winning the heart of your wife
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Author:  Celina [ Mon May 12, 2008 12:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Winning the heart of your wife
[font=Arial]1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce
2. Give sincere salaams
3. Treat her gently - like a fragile vessel
4. Advise in private, at the best time, in the best way and atmosphere
5. Be generous with her
6. Warm the seat for her, you will warm her heart
7. Avoid anger, keep wudu at all times
8. Look good and smell great for your wife
9. Don’t be rigid or harsh-hearted or you will be broken
10. Be a good listener
11. Yes for flattery, No for arguing
12. Call your wife with the best names, cute nicknames, names she loves to hear
13. Utilize pleasant surprises
14. Preserve and guard the tongue
15. Expect, accept, and overlook her shortcomings
16. Give sincere compliments
17. Encourage her to keep good relations with her family
18. Speak about topics that interest her
19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is
20. Give each other gifts
21. Get rid of routine, surprise her
22. Have a good opinion of each other
23. Have good manners, overlook small things, don’t nitpick
24. Add a drop of patience, increase drops during pregnancy, menses
25. Expect and respect her jealously
26. Be humble
27. Sacrifice your happiness for hers
28. Help at home and with housework
29. Help her love your relatives, but don’t try to force her
30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you
31. Remember your wife in dua
32. Leave the past for Allah subhanahu wa ta ala, don’t dwell on, dig into, or bring it up.
33. Don’t act as if you are doing her a favor by working or providing, Allah is the Provider, the husband is the carrier of the sustenance to the family
34. Take shaytaan as your enemy, not your wife
35. Put food in your wife’s mouth
36. Treat your wife like she is the most precious pearl that you want to protect
37. Show her your smile
38. Don’t ignore the small things, deal with them before they become big
39. Avoid being harsh-hearted
40. Respect and show that you appreciate her thinking
41. Help her to find and build her inner strengths and skills
42. Respect that she might not be in mood for intimacy, stay within halal boundaries
43. Help her take care of the children
44. Give her gifts with your tongue, be an artist with your compliments
45. Sit down and eat meals together
46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice
47. Don’t leave home in anger
48. Maintain the secrecy and privacy of the home
49. Encourage each other in ibaadat
50. Respect and fulfill her rights upon you
51. Live with her in kindness, goodness, fairness in good and bad times
52. Kiss your wife, foreplay, “Don’t jump on her like a bull”
53. Keep disputes between the two of you, don’t take it outside
54. Show care for her health and well-being
55. Remember you are not always right or perfect yourself
56. Share your happiness and sadness with her
57. Have mercy for her weaknesses
58. Be a firm support for her to lean on
59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal
60. Have a good intention for her[/font]

Guys, for further information, you can also purchase this book 'Winning the Heart of Your Wife' by Ibraahim Ibn Saaleh Al Mahmud
Author:  abdul hye [ Mon May 12, 2008 1:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
61. Buy her jewellery and shoes once a week and she will be happy until your money runs out.
Author:  Maheda_B [ Mon May 12, 2008 2:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
abdul hye wrote:
61. Buy her jewellery and shoes once a week and she will be happy until your money runs out.


:lol: well brother, you must see to her needs. If thats what pleases her then you gotta do it...BUT the wife should understand as well. :)
Author:  Sima [ Mon May 12, 2008 2:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
That is funny!

But its true - women are very materialistic but then what Maheda said is right.

As long as a woman has a brother, father or a husband she shouldn't have to pay for anything!
Author:  Celina [ Mon May 12, 2008 10:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
If women stopped needing jewellery and shoes the world would not be normal!!! :P

infact, islamically women are supposed to dress nicely, wear nice jewellery and look appealing in order to please their husband. so i think it is quite justified why women can be a little on the materialistic side! :D :P
Author:  Maheda_B [ Tue May 13, 2008 2:10 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sima wrote:
As long as a woman has a brother, father or a husband she shouldn't have to pay for anything!


YUP - thats why, when a fathers wealth is divided, the brothers get more, so that they can provide for their sisters when they need to. :D
Author:  mooktakim [ Tue May 13, 2008 2:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
Actually normally the sisters don't get a share of the wealth :P

Basically when the sisters marry, they move out of the current family and into the new family. All the land and wealth stays with the current family (except for those that she created herself). Thats the norm. Although, many people still share between sisters too.
Author:  Maheda_B [ Tue May 13, 2008 2:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
well then that means if the brother are getting more, they can give more, innit! Image
Author:  I_have_soul_and_rhythm [ Sun Mar 22, 2009 12:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
This post actually made a very good Sunday morning read. All 60 points are valid, in particular 36) and 59), I often see married individuals take each other for granted... and its not right. I'm unmarried myself but can envisage it to include hardships (aswell as the many awesome aspects), its too easy to pick on each other's frailties and compare one's partner to others. Think its important to have realistic expectations (its not abt marrying a prince for ever) and realize that when married,the marriage takes a priority over all else....
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